Resources

Reconciliation Resources

THERAPY:

American Association of Marriage and Family Therapists – association of therapists who provide family therapy.
Joshua Coleman, PhD – psychologist who counsels and provides trainings specific to estranged family members to help them reconcile.
Bowen Center for the Study of the Family – organization that offers psychotherapy and “coaching” for estranged family members.

CONFLICT MEDIATION:

Academy of Professional Family Mediators – academy that helps individuals find local professional family mediators.
Talking Alternatives – organization that provides mediation services and “communication coaching” to estranged family members.
National Association for Community Mediation – association that helps connect individuals with local mediation programs.

Project News

“Anthony Hopkins Reveals Shocking Truths about Family Estrangement in his New Memoir” – article by Vuyile Madwantsi on MSN.com.
“I’ve Been Stupid and I Miss You’: The Family Members Who Buried the Hatchet after Years of Silence” – article by Deborah Linton in The Guardian.
“Dealing With Family Estrangement? These Books Can Help” – article by Hope Reese in the New York Times.
“Should You Ever Cut Ties with your Parents?” – article by Miriam Frankel on BBC.com.
“Why So Many People Are Going “No Contact” with Their Parents” – article by Anna Russell in The New Yorker.
“‘No Contact’: Family Estrangement Is Seeing an Uptick with Younger Generations” – article by Theara Coleman in The Week.
“Course Guides Professionals Working with People Estranged from Family Members” – article by Sheri Hall in the Cornell Chronicle.
“Personal Conflicts, Even Violence, Are Not Uncommon in Long-Term Care” – article by Paula Span in the New York Times.
“Estrangement is Never Easy or Straightforward: Psychologists can Help” – article by Rachel Fairbank in the APA Monitor.
“Old and Young, Talking Again” – article by Paula Span in the New York Times.
“Evidence-Based Tips for Holiday Family Gatherings” – article by Tyler Woods in Psychology Today.
“How to Reconcile With an Estranged Relative” – article by Belinda Luscombe in TIME.
“The No. 1 Key to a Happier, Longer Life ‘That Younger People Don’t Know” – article by Shane Parrish in CNBC.
“Royal Repair Kit: How Does One Heal a Family Rift?” – article by Anca Ulea in Euronews.
“Connecting With Older Adults is Good for You and Them” – article by Abigail Fagan in Psychology Today.
“How to Actually Enjoy the Holidays” – article by Hannah Seo, et al. in the New York Times.
“Expert Tips for Reaching Out to Estranged Family Members” – article by Alexandria Brooks in Women’s World.
“When the Ties that Bind Are Cut” – article by Tamara Markard in the Greeley Tribune.
“Estranged From Your Grandchildren? There Might Be Hope” – article by Katherine Skiba on AARP.org.
“Families Try Making Up after Pandemic Fights over Vaccines, Masks and Tests” – article by Clare Ansberry in the Wall Street Journal.
“Family Rifts Affect Millions of Americans – Research Shows Possible Paths from Estrangement toward Reconciliation” – article by staff at The Conversation.
“How to Successfully Transfer Wealth” – article by Bank of America Private Bank on Bankofamerica.com.
“Family Estrangement: Why Adults Are Cutting Off Their Parents” – article by Maddy Savage on BBC.com.
“One in Four Adults is Estranged from Family and Paying a Psychological Price” – article by Galit Atlas in the Los Angeles Times.
“How to Grieve Estranged Family and Friends During the Holidays” – article by Christina Wyman in the Washington Post.
“The Family Issue of The Highlight” – article by Vox staff on Vox.com.
“Family Feuds: When Bonds are Broken” – interview by Susan Spencer on CBS News.
“Fractured Families and How To Mend Them” – podcast from Let's Talk Family Enterprise on Amazon Music.
“What’s Ripping American Families Apart?” – article by David Brook in the New York Times.
“Helping Grandma and Grandpa Get Back in the Groove” – interview by Sanjay Gupta in the podcast Chasing Life.
“6 Ways to Mend a Family Rift and Find Connection, Love, and Harmony” – article by Kristina Mastrocola in Women’s World.
“How to Reconcile After a Family Rift” – interview by Sharon Walker in the Guardian.
“The Depths Of Estrangement: Why Family Rifts Happen And How To Heal” – interview by Robin Young on WBUR.
“Broken Branches” – article by Beth Saulnier in the Cornell Alumni Magazine.
“The Causes of Estrangement, and How Families Heal” – article by Paula Spann in the New York Times.
“Family Estrangement a Problem ‘Hiding in Plain Sight’” – interview by James Dean in the Cornell Chronicle.

Other ResearcH

Agllias, K. (2017). Family Estrangement: A Matter of Perspective. Routledge. https://doi.org/10.4324/9781315581910.
Agllias, K. (2018). No Longer on Speaking Terms: The Losses Associated with Family Estrangement at the End of Life. Families in Society: The Journal of Contemporary Social Services, 92(1), 107–113. https://doi.org/10.1606/1044-3894.4055.
Blake, L. & Bland, B. (2020). The Counseling Experiences of Individuals Who Are Estranged from a Family Member. Family Relations, 69(4), 820–831. https://doi.org/10.1111/fare.12385.
Blake, L., Rouncefield‐Swales, A., Bland, B., & Carter, B. (2023). An Interview Study Exploring Clients' Experiences of Receiving Therapeutic Support for Family Estrangement in the UK. Counselling and Psychotherapy Research, 23(1), 105–114. https://doi.org/10.1002/capr.12603.
Bernstein, A. (2007). Re-visioning, Restructuring, and Reconciliation: Clinical Practice with Complex Postdivorce Families. Family Process, 46(1), 67–78. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1545-5300.2006.00192.x.
Carr, K., Holman, A., Abetz, J., Kellas, J. K., & Vagnoni, E. (2015). Giving Voice to the Silence of Family Estrangement: Comparing Reasons of Estranged Parents and Adult Children in a Nonmatched Sample. Journal of Family Communication, 15, 130–140. https://doi.org/10.1080/15267431.2015.1013106.
Coleman, J. (2024). Rules of Estrangement: Why Adult Children Cut Ties and How to Heal the Conflict. Random House.
Conti, R. (2015). Family Estrangement: Establishing a Prevalence Rate. Journal of Psychology and Behavioral Science, 3(2), 28–35. http://dx.doi.org/10.15640/jpbs.v3n2a4.
Dattilio, F., & Nichols, M. (2011). Reuniting Estranged Family Members: A Cognitive-Behavioral-Systemic Perspective. The American Journal of Family Therapy, 39(2), 88–99. https://doi.org/10.1080/01926187.2010.530169.
Douglas, D. & Steinberg, B. (2008). Motivational Models for Spontaneous Reunification with the Alienated Child: Part I. The American Journal of Family Therapy, 36(2), 107–115. https://doi.org/10.1080/01926180701643131.
Douglas, D. & Steinberg, B. (2008). Motivational Models for Spontaneous Reunification with the Alienated Child: Part II. The American Journal of Family Therapy, 36(3), 253–261. https://doi.org/10.1080/01926180701643230.
Gilligan, M., Suitor, J. J., Pillemer, K. (2022). Patterns and Processes of Intergenerational Estrangement: A Qualitative Study of Mother-Adult Child Relationships Across Time. Research on Aging, 44(5-6), 436-447. https://doi.org/10.1177/01640275211036966
Gilligan, M., Suitor, J. J., & Pillemer, K. (2015). Estrangement Between Mothers and Adult Children: The Role of Norms and Values. Journal of Marriage and the Family, 77(4), 908–920. https://doi.org/10.1111/jomf.12207.
Katz, S. (2002). Healing the Father-Son Relationship: A Qualitative Inquiry into Adult Reconciliation. Journal of Humanistic Psychology, 42(3), 13–52. https://doi.org/10.1177/00267802042003003.
Nolte, J., Cope, M., Pillemer, K (2022). What Causes Older Parent-Adult Child Estrangement? A Qualitative Interview Study. Innovation in Aging, 6(Suppl. 1), 631–632. https://doi.org/10.1093/geroni/igac059.2343
Scharp, K. M. (2023). Estrangement and Impact on Family Communication. In Oxford Research Encyclopedia of Communication. https://doi.org/10.1093/acrefore/9780190228613.013.1454.
Scharp, K. & Curron, T. (2018). Caregiving When There is Family Conflict and Estrangement. Journal of the American Society on Aging, 40(3), 51–56. https://www.jstor.org/stable/26591703.